Why am I here...?

I've kind of become an old hand at living in Singapore, having been here nearly two years. For most ex-pats it seems to be getting past year one that is the hurdle - it is the kind of place that either really suits you or simply never will. Oh, there are plenty I know who have been here far, far longer than I, but I am also acutely aware of the seemingly never-ending train of folk who flit in and out of my life... stop-over new friends for a stop-over city.

Now, I have never been a city lover, not one bit. Especially London, that sprawling, choking, migraine inducing ode to claustrophobia. Yes, I know I lived in Wakefield for a while, but that was a very small city, not much bigger than the market town of Banbury. And, yes, I love Glasgow, with its galleries and bars and parks and sheer vibrancy, but I have never imagined myself as a full-time resident. So what is it that makes Singapore feel right for me?

One can cite all the cliches of cleanliness, low crime, even lower taxes and so on but as much as these are all undoubted selling points they alone are not enough to keep me here. The weather is obviously good and the food delectable, but I never minded the cold and have always been a drinker rather than an eater (and drink is one thing that is more costly than in the UK). My main reason for staying has been perhaps some of the fantastic friends I have made here, both ex-pat and local, but as I have equally fantastic friends all over the UK as well surely that isn't what compels me to remain... is it?

Truth is, I don't know exactly why I'm here. I only know that right now I don't want to be anywhere else. Okay, maybe a few days on a beach or in the hills (even in this most green-leafed of island cities you can miss peaceful Mother Nature from time to time), but I'd still come back. I know that as much as I love Jura it doesn't hold what I need right now... as much as I miss friends in Banbury I've outgrown my childhood haunts... as much as I loved being in Wakefield I'm bloody well 32 now and need to stop aping Trofimov from The Cherry Orchard, questing to remain the eternal student...

More than that I need to become me. No, I don't mean 'find myself' - bleuch!! - I already know myself, thank you very much. But we often become defined by our surroundings and the people I was in each of the three places where I spent most of my life no longer exist. Even if that is how you remember me...

This is me. Welcome to my world. I hope you enjoy your stay. Please wipe your feet at the door...

Peace out,
Alex